I AM...
11:30:00
I'm torn
Comfort or the unknown?
Safety or the raging cold?
For I can justify my calmness for wisdom;
My fear as common sense.
My reluctance as divine restraint
And leave territories in agony
Comfort or the unknown?
Safety or the raging cold?
For I can justify my calmness for wisdom;
My fear as common sense.
My reluctance as divine restraint
And leave territories in agony
I'm torn
Even though I talk tough
About a God that's wanting to own me.
Not just a section or a fragment
But the whole me, wholly, holy, only
For Him and not as I please;
Of Christianity not of choice or ease
But of a faith of which, with a gushing wind
Leads me to uncharted waters,
With cripples standing and maimed restored
The blind see ex-widows' husbands alive,
A gushing wind beyond my control,
Beyond choice, a sale of self beyond lease.
Even though I talk tough
About a God that's wanting to own me.
Not just a section or a fragment
But the whole me, wholly, holy, only
For Him and not as I please;
Of Christianity not of choice or ease
But of a faith of which, with a gushing wind
Leads me to uncharted waters,
With cripples standing and maimed restored
The blind see ex-widows' husbands alive,
A gushing wind beyond my control,
Beyond choice, a sale of self beyond lease.
Because whatever I do is right in my eyes.
If I spend my days searching for millions
Or skills acquisitions
Making me a wiz,
I'll say its God I seek to please.
I'll give Him the glory, still I will
But still, I'm not stilled.
If I spend my days searching for millions
Or skills acquisitions
Making me a wiz,
I'll say its God I seek to please.
I'll give Him the glory, still I will
But still, I'm not stilled.
Cause a part of me says I should let go
Forget my degree and brace the freezing cold
Heat up the flames of evangelism that tear at my earthly goals
Rebuke a false voice that says its okay to blend in
And be best at common
Let go of the extreme,
"Radicalism is a sin.
Get the money, support the missions. Be rich".
Forget my degree and brace the freezing cold
Heat up the flames of evangelism that tear at my earthly goals
Rebuke a false voice that says its okay to blend in
And be best at common
Let go of the extreme,
"Radicalism is a sin.
Get the money, support the missions. Be rich".
But I fear that voice
I fear the extreme
I fear the letting go
I fear the loss of all things planned, all things structured
My five-year plan, a solid one I might add
I fear the spirit calling me to be crazy in love with crazy
To be crazy enough to let go
I fear the extreme
I fear the letting go
I fear the loss of all things planned, all things structured
My five-year plan, a solid one I might add
I fear the spirit calling me to be crazy in love with crazy
To be crazy enough to let go
So God, sort it out.
Who are you? And who have you made me to be?
The red-eyed preacher with the gramophone
Telling market women about Jesus
Or the posh CEO in the corner office
Sponsoring radio shows broadcasting Him.
Who are you? And who have you made me to be?
The red-eyed preacher with the gramophone
Telling market women about Jesus
Or the posh CEO in the corner office
Sponsoring radio shows broadcasting Him.
Let me know so I can stop this groan
Who have you made me to be?
I don't know. I really don't know.
And that's why I'm torn.
I don't know who I should be; who you've made me.
I AM, who am I?
Please tell me. Who am I?
'Cause I have no idea who I AM.
Who have you made me to be?
I don't know. I really don't know.
And that's why I'm torn.
I don't know who I should be; who you've made me.
I AM, who am I?
Please tell me. Who am I?
'Cause I have no idea who I AM.
4 comments
I am currently in this dilemma myself. But one thing God keeps reminding me of is the Daniel story. Daniel had a balance, he excled at work such that the only flaw he had was that he prayed 3 times a day. Meaning he was diligent at work, he was skilled, he knew his job and did it better than anyone in Babylon, yet Daniel saw visions that are still coming to pass today. He saw the most bizarre visions, he had deep spiritual understanding. I believe you can have a balance, God can help you strike that balance. God would use that degree, job to do his purpose because there are some classes of people that only you would be able to reach for God through your degree, job, network, exposure. Let God lead Ochuko, he knows you heart and he knows how he would set up up shortly that would be perfect. However, don't let the fire die.. NEVER!!
ReplyDeleteThanks. This really helped. Daniel was a godly intellectual.
ReplyDeleteIt's good that at this stage of one's life, you are paying close attention to your maker. The truth is that, the person that designed you is in the best position to make full fill purpose. Purpose!!!! Every person alive now has one and it only takes the maker Himself to make you attain the purpose that He alone designed for you. Keep the fire burning Ochuko, for God is definitely taking you somewhere worth going and only Him knows the route, so stay on Him!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteGod calls each one of us by name, one by one in our present circumstances, our vocation or our profession.most times the mistake most people make is dreaming of a day they will live everything behind (literarily) and go to an unknown territory to preach Christ but the truth is that many people never get the chance or if they do they people may not listen because they would feel you do not understand or you are 'Mr Perfect'. If you look around you, right where you are they are people that need that message not just by preaching but by your example. Your family, your friends, you colleagues. Especially your colleagues,since people no longer see the importance of an honest job. if you do your professional work well, that already is evangelism. You will stand before kings and not mere men. Jesus Christ was first known as a carpenter before he started his public ministry.Professional Work is not alien to do what God wants. It was right in the middle of their work that Jesus called his disciples,from fishermen to tax collectors.You can do the same. Keep the fire burning!
ReplyDelete