At a second glance she looks the same. Smells like grape juice and oranges with the acidity of lime. She, standing so close to him brings her  scent to his nostrils avidly. Her smile is forceful, demanding a response.

She's beautiful no doubt, but I was expecting to pen something different. About his girlfriend and how her face lights up the room. How the deadness of her stare gives him life, or some of those euphemistic writer cow dung. This should be a love piece to make the ladies pray for a dream relationship like theirs. This should be about conjugal bliss.

But this is about something else. This is about a girl, caught up in a crush, in love with a boy that longs for another. This is about the lovelessness of relationships conditioned by unavailability and frustrated desires.

Of how she gave him green light after green light, her eyes pleading for his affection. A story of how he turned her down, time after time, taunting and teasing her for wanting him. While his heart stopped beating when his crush walked in; how he went back to her when said crush destroyed his ego. A story of selfishness, stubbornness and involuntary heart shoving.

Call it a tragedy, or a practical romantic tale. But standing next to her, a million feelings erupt. Regret, pain, apathy, responsibility and disapproval. As they walk hand in hand, love consumes her heart. Ironically, love burns in his heart all the more.

Love. For another.

I was gonna say
That I like Marvel and DC
How they prove you can tell a good story
Without the sex scenes
and how I think their movies soothe me
Was gonna tell you but you wouldn't understand me

Just like the other day
When I saw you and my heart leaped for joy
Before I would run and we would hug for seconds more
But then I smiled and watched you run along
Wonder where the energy went and I became a bore

Deep down I'm glancing
At the pretty little things that made us  laugh out loudly
Deep lyrics, puns and Reach Record beats
But now I barely get a chance to
Tell you how my spirit weakens when Bethel Music sing
How can you love music but not say you do?

Even when I pray to God
Before I spoke of the pain and how it burnt me
Then I danced in the joy and for the blessings
and thanked Him that He made me so happy
Now I kneel in silence and speak in tongues beyond me
Finding peace in the dialect of angels and heavens

I bit my lip and twisted my tongue
In the pursuit of dreams, I lost my voice
Unable to express that in my heart there is love
Gentleness in my speech but warmth in my hug
With a little patience I pray you decipher the quietness
and be the translator to my cryptic speech

The big fish is...
A desire to take over territories
but the weaponry seized from you
The ability to bag another degree
and the emptiness that comes with it
The brains of a billionaire
without the drive of a Lamborghini
The dream of a Prince Charming
that never really comes true

Tarshish is...
a place of seeming comfort
Where all your dreams come true
Where you are set above your peers
Like the prosperity preacher said you would

Nineveh is...
The place God takes control
and the unbelievable comes alive
Where change begins and men are touched
and you become the tool and not the Carpenter

So before life storms begin to rock
and the boats to your destinations dock
You are faced with a choice
Take control or let the Spirit lead
An inexplicable journey, or the belly of the big fish